Ice Barbie Exults Glorious Leader Trump For PreventIng U.S. Hurricanes Landfalls In 2025,

Kristi "Ice Barbie" Noem praised Donald Trump 
yesterday for keeping hurricanes away from the U.S.
My guess is he used a Sharpie to do that. 

Hurricane season ended last Sunday, and with that, we can rejoice that the United States was not hit by a hurricane this year for the first time since 2015. 

And to whom do we owe that great fortune? President Trump himself! 

We learned this via one of Trump's cabinet meetings, this one held on Tuesday. .You know the ones, where each cabinet secretary praise glorious leader to an extreme that would make North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jung-Un blush.  

Meanwhile, Trump snoozes. 

Which gets me to the hurricane story. None other that Homeland Secretary Kristi "Ice Barbie" Noem, said to "daddy" this gem. "Sir, you made it through hurricane season without a hurricane....Even you kept the hurricanes away. We appreciate that."

Well, I for one definitely appreciate that the U.S. was not hit by a hurricane this year. Gawd knows we have enough problems with adding hurricanes to the mix. 

Ice Barbie did not disclose how Trump kept the hurricanes away. My guess is with a Sharpie, but I don't know how exactly he pulled that off.   

I do see a scandal brewing Trump's Great Hurricane Accomplishment, though. Trump somehow failed to prevent that big flood during the July 4 weekend, the one that killed 135 people, several of whom were girls at a Christian summer camp. 

Christian summer camp? You would have thought the god-like Trump would have intervened, since he and his MAGA follows tell us they're such good Christians. 

There was, of course, trouble with hurricanes in the Atlantic Ocean this year. Hurricane Melissa devastated parts of Jamaica in late October.  I don't think Trump had any influence on that storm, but what does he care? It's not as if he's into helping other nations anyway. 

Other hurricanes that did not hit the United States still caused trouble, like stirring up waves that washed seaside homes on the Outer Banks of North Carolina into the ocean. I guess Trump should have nudged those storms further out to sea, or made the go away with his Big Beautiful Bill, or some damn thing. 

Meanwhile, I'm not really happy with the weather here in Vermont. We're expecting snow squalls and bitterly cold air. Can't Trump push that away from us?

Oh, wait, we're a blue state. He's probably pulling that wintry weather our way as punishment. Even if he has to import it from Canada. What is the tariff rate on cold fronts? 

"Daily Show" Takes On Climate Refuge Cities By Going To Duluth

"The Daily Show" poked affectionate fun at Duluth,
Minnesota being considered a "climate refuge"

Here in Vermont last summer, we learned the hard way that the Green Mountain State isn't quite the great climate change refuge it's been made out to be.  

Sure, we're in a safer spot than many areas, despite our flood risks.  A 2021 study that said six of the 10 safest counties from the ravages of climate in all of the United States are located in Vermont

I suppose that's still true, despite our floods. 

Other regions regarded as most safe from climate change are scattered around the Great Lakes. One of those safe places is Duluth, Minnesota. 

Ah yes, Duluth.  The place that until this winter anyway pretty much stayed below zero. Where the "gales of November" blast off to Lake Superior into the this city of 86,000 people.  Summers are nice, though. 

The Daily Show's Michael Kosta investigates the idea of climate refugees from fashionable zip codes in California and Florida showing up in unassuming Duluth to flee climate change driven wildfires and hurricanes and such. 

Kosta arrives in Duluth to play one of those elite coastal types who looks down on flyover cities like Duluth asking how people from, say California, would ever want to move to Duluth.

The Daily Show's Michael Kosta ventured to 
Duluth to see if the northern Minnesota city was
really a great climate refuge for coastal elites. 

The city's Chief Sustainability Officer Mindy Granley told Kosta that people from climate disaster prone places like California are already starting to move to Duluth. 

"You mean people are moving here from the good states,?" Kosta asks incredulously .

He then meets one of those California transplants. She tells Kosta that the small town feel of Duluth makes her feel like neighbors can rely on one another when climate change causes problems or even danger. 

Wait, I thought Duluth was a climate refuge?  

Like Vermont, Duluth isn't immune to our altered environment For one thing, Duluth is having a climate change winter, big time.  This will be by far its warmest winter on record, and that has messed up the usual winter sports such as snowshoeing, ice fishing and such in the region. 

Storms can ravage Duluth, too. Flash flooding September damaged parts of the city and an even worse flood in 2012 caused widespread damage in and around the city. An intense storm in October, 2018, sent Lake Superior waves crashing into shoreline parks and property causing quite a bit of destruction, too. 

Here's the Daily Show Duluth climate video. It is pretty funny, in the usual Daily Show snarky way. Click on this link to view, or if you see the image below, click on that: 

Blizzard Twitter Thread Hilariously Abuses People In "Alternative Realities"

A Twitter thread set the logic of anti-vaxers and anti-maskers
to last weekend's blizzard in New England
to hilarious effect. 

I spotted a Twitter thread  this past Sunday that perfectly and hilariously used the Blizzard of '22 in New England last weekend as a jumping off point to highlight the absolutely logistic boneheadedness we see in the national "dialogue" over Covid vaxes and masks. 

You've heard all the stupid ways of "thinking" in the examples below, but applying the line of "reasoning" to winter weather just makes it both funny and sad. It also makes it clear how a lot of people don't think at all before opening their mouths.

 James Hamblin (@jameshamblin) started it with this post: 

"So we're supposed to ''prepare for blizzard conditions' just because the scientific establishment and the media say so? And anyone who says it will be sunny and 70 is canceled? All's I' saying is, lots of $ changing hands in snow shovel industry. Do your own meteorology."

The post garnered responses like these:

"I can't breathe with a scarf covering my face. Gloves are for the fearful. Frostbite only affects 1% of total skin surfaces."

Joe Rogan and his misinformation sort of gets a shoutout here: "I never listen to MSM weather. I get my info from Snow Rogan. He drives in blizzards all the time and doesn't even use snow tires. It is a hoax perpetrated by Big tire. Don't be a sheep."

How about the "just take your vitamins and let your immune system protect you" crowd?  Here's a good takedown: "If you exercise, eat well, megadose on vitamin C+D, you won't even need coats, gloves or hats. Your natural immunity to cold will take care of you. Everyone wearing warm clothes are sheep with pre-existing sensitivities to temperature. Do your own research and stick it to big cotton."

Photo of a commie socialist using government overreach
to clean up after a snowstorm. 

Some people get Covid even if they've had the vaccine, cry the anti-vaxers. So how's this? "And some people still freeze to death when they wear a coat! What's the point of wearing one if it's not guaranteed to keep me from dying of hypothermia? Not to mention it's made out of 50% Luciifester. That's how the satanists will control us in the blizzard!  

 Those people on Facebook outsmarted Anthony Fauci with their miracle cures, right?  "My aunt's next door neighbor started drinking this stuff called 'rum.' It doesn't freeze! So if you drink it, you won't freeze!"   

Or: "My neighbor Bob had an accident even after putting on winter tires. Some drivers are already on their 3rd set of tires, which proves their ineffectiveness. We do not know what the tires are made of. The tire manufacturers scare us with winter just to enrich themselves."

And: "I just talked to my sister in Texas...get this. No snow where they are. None. But all these liberal northeast states are screaming about snow? Something doesn't add up."

We can't get through this discussion without bringing up our "rights", um, right? "What about my rights as a parent? I don't want some atheist communist weatherman telling my kid that water freezes at 32 degrees. If I say it's safe to drive it's not their place to contradict me." 

So yeah, we covered pretty much all the talking points that the anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers have, but applied the logic to the Blizzard of '22.  

It all seems pretty silly, no?

National Weather Service Office In Sacramento Needn't Have Apologized For Donner Pass Tweet

As this graphic from Fox Weather shows, TONS of snow are
in the forecast for California's Sierra Nevada range.
The National Weather Service office in Sacramento tweeted
 a Donner Party joke about the situation, but needn't
have apologized. 

 It's been snowing like crazy the last few days in California's Sierra Nevada mountains. Plenty more is on the way. 

Yay!  

Great for skiers, great for putting a dent in California's drought, what's not to love?

Well, Christmas week travel through those mountains could get tricky. So the National Weather Service office in Sacramento, California decided to warn people by posting this tweet:

The Donner Party, of course, were 81 people who became stranded in the Sierra Nevada in the winter of 1846-47 and resorted to cannibalism to stay alive as much of the party died of cold and starvation. 

NWS Sacramento soon followed up with a mea culpa:

"We apologize for the reference on this post which was insensitive. The main message for the upcoming week is that multiple rounds of heavy mountain snow will make for difficult holiday travel. Please stay up to date on the latest forecast and alter travel as necessary."

OK, sure they went back to being serious scientists, but the apology was totally unnecessary.   The original Donner Party tweet was funny, and effectively captured the public's attention about the dangerous travel far more than a dry just the facts ma'am statement would have. 

Lots of people on Twitter agree.

Some comments on Twitter: 

"This is what happens when the tweet boss takes the week off for Christmas, or perhaps when tweets are created at the office Christmas Party," said @RealGaryMcMahon.

Here's a tweet that I know speaks the truth: "I for one appreciate the dark humor. Few people realize that meteorologists as a whole are replete with dark humor but pass it on with too much subtlety to be notied by most. Just look at any long range forecast, said @gregladen. 

The @NWSSacramento Donner post also inspired lots of inappropriate, but hysterically funny responses.  

Such as:

"NWS Sacramento, please share your Donner Party recipes," said @HendersonBio.

Which inspired this list of possible Donner meals from @Chris_racCoons

"Roast Keith, Baked Petey, Honey baked Pam, spaghetti and meat Pauls, Brick oven Lisa"

Which prompts me to ask whether any of these go well with fava beans and a nice chianti.

Well, maybe not. 

In any event, enjoy the snow, Sierra Nevada residents. I just hope you stocked up on supplies! 

  

  

Chris's RacCoons

@Chris_racCoons

·

Dec 20

Ooh, I started a list: Roast Keith Baked Petey Honey baked Pam Spaghetti and meat Pauls Brick oven Lisa

Sarah Burris

@SarahBurris

·

Dec 21

Replying to

@NWSSacramento

"Donner, party of six?... no five.... no four..."

Dread Pirate Sex Badger

@jgb00m

·

Dec 20

Replying to

@NWSSacramento

People. The other other white meat.

Alex Jones Gets Weather Wacky Again, Says Biden Unleashed Kentucky Tornadoes

Totally not crazy Alex Jones thinks Joe Biden unleashed
can control weather and unleashed deadly tornadoes
on Kentucky earlier this month. 

Crazy conspiracy theorist Alex Jones would be both pathetic and hysterical if he didn't try so hard to hurt people with his wackadoodle musings. 

I dislike him intensely, as many people do, but his latest weather-related rant is sort of entertaining, in a skewed-brain sort of way. 

As Media Matters notes,  Jones informs us the government weather weapons were developed in the 1950s.  Biden is apparently using them in nasty ways, such as cutting the power to Texas during that horrible cold snap last February, and unleashing those tornadoes earlier this month down in Kentucky.

To be fair, he doesn't come right out and say Biden ordered the tornadoes, but Jones uses that go-to canard that "It is a legitimate question to ask."

 In that spirit, I'll ask a question of Jones: Are you freaking nuts?

I'll answer that! Yes.  

I'm not quite sure why Biden would order a tornado strike on Kentucky. And you'd think if Biden was powerful enough to create gigantic tornadoes, he would have cowed Joe Manchin into agreeing to the president's Build Back Better legislation. 

Somehow, though, I think Biden's too nice a guy to unleash tornadoes on innocent Kentuckians. Even if most of them didn't vote for Biden.  

What's next, Alex? What weather disaster are you going to blame on some vast, weird government conspiracy? I'm sure the Illuminati has got something up their sleeves, right?

 

I Demand World Meteorological Organization Approve These New Weather Terms

People in Burlington, Vermont walk gingerly on icy 
sidewalks after a bout of Sleeze (a mix of sleet and
freezing rain) on Feb. 6, 2019. 

 We're getting into the winter weather season, which means many of us in the Northern Hemisphere are starting to deal with a variety of nasty winter precipitation types.  

As great as outfits like the National Weather Service and countless local meteorologists are, we really need to make winter weather terms, shall we say, punchy. It'll get everyone's attention .

I was inspired by this yesterday when a few half melted sleet pellets landed on me when I was trying to get my last garden stuff done before winter.

The sleet was basically slush. Not really ice, not really water. 

So, what fell on me Wednesday was Sleesh

That's a mashup between sleet and slush. It gets the point across.

This got me thinking about other types of winter precipitation and which words we should use to describe them.  

Here's a sampling of what I came up with. 

Frizzle: Freezing drizzle. Just mash up the two words to make things efficient. 

Sleeze: A mixture of sleet and freezing rain

Slain: A mixture of sleet and rain.

Sneeze: A mix of snow and freezing rain.

Sneet: Mixed snow and sleet.

Sleeze: Mixed sleet and freezing rain. 

Snain: Mixed snow and (non-frozen) rain. 

Snail: Graupel. Which is essentially a hail/snow combo all in one, so just combine snow and hail into one word. 

Some of the words I came up with are already in use for decidedly non-meteorological things.  But I'm sure the wordy dictionary loving types can come up with new words, to describe issues like what we do when we have allergies, the past tense of a murder, and a slow moving, shelled gastropod. 

We've all had to make big adjustments during this long pandemic, so what's another adjustment to the English language?  I'm sure non-weather geeks could find other words  "Slain", "Sneeze" and "Snail" and let us have those words. 

This is a demand, a plea, to the World Meteorological Organization to accept these words as official, scientific weather terms. 

To keep up the pressure, lets get the National Weather Service, Environment Canada, the UK Met Office and all the other national weather bureaus to sign on.  Plus the private weather companies, like the Weather Channel, AccuWeather, WeatherNation and others. 

The bottom line is we need to make bad weather as fun as possible. These words do the trick.